My turn: 100 Things I Love About the Movies

You ought to know the drill - it's pretty self-explanatory. Thanks go out to all of the folks I've seen who've done this here exercise, most notably the muse, The Droid You're Looking For.

* Time travel movies
* Red Apple cigarettes

* Billy Zabka
* "Pain don't hurt."
* Anthony Kiedis in Point Break
* The music of David Holmes
* The Pangea of languages spoken in Code 46
* Michel Gondry
* Dr. Rosenpenis
* "Violence inherent in the system!"



* "You throw me the idol, I throw you the whip."
* The Rushmore soundtrack
* The eternal snubbing of Mike Judge (runaway success might drain his powers)
* William Fichtner getting upset at the mention of Amway
* The brilliance of editing/sound editing for Avi's arrival/departure from London
* "Clay. Bill Clay."
* Dashiell Parr
* Wiley Wiggins pinching his nose and pushing his hair behind his ears
* Lone Pine Mall
* Tim Burton's Batman
* Galaxy Quest
* That it's become okay to like Garden State (and its soundtrack) again
* "Anybody want a peanut?"
* Bolo Yeung
* Val Kilmer in Tombstone
* Freedom = $1.05
* Martin Scorcese's pop sountracks
* Hating Nicolas Cage
* The Wicker Man (2006)
* "Masheen!"
* Adaptations of Elmore Leonard novels
* The fantasy Tim Robbins' beatdown in High Fidelity
* People not sitting near me at the theater
* Netflix (duh)
* BOTH car chases in Ronin
* What might be the most quotable movie ever: Napoleon Dynamite
* The Mentos-zation of Bloodsport



* The idiotic, pseudo-brilliant mind of Richard Kelly
* Yes, the first 10 minutes of Up
* The Gypsy Cab Company
* Lola's lungs
* "Would you like to know more?"
* Shermer, Illinois
* The resilience of the Coen Brothers
* Trainspotting's introductory montage
* The stubbornness of one Roy McAvoy
* Roxanne's 20 Something Betters
* The Wrestler's video game


* Listening to movie podcasts
* "What is a quince?"
* My experience watching Grindhouse in the theater
* Dolly zooms
* The end of The Game
Watching the crappy version of The Time Machine for the 47th time
* Alfred Molina rocking out to "Sister Christian"
* Trying to narrow down my favorite parts of Black Dynamite
* Ferris Bueller talking to the camera

* Seeing a classic film for the first time that lives up to the advance billing
* Heist flicks
* Raisinets, popcorn and soda
* "Thass not a knife…now thass a knife!"
* Being known as a walking movie Wikipedia
* Spotting That Guys in movies ("Sweet - John Carroll Lynch is in this!")
* The Cult of The Room
* Retroactively seeing stars in films before they were famous (i.e. Sam Jackson in Coming to America)
* The original Out of Sight poster


* That little guys really can compete with the big boys
* The LAMB
* Chris Tucker's star-making performance in Friday
* The genuine camaraderie between Butch and Sundance
* 80s comedies
* 90s indies
* Chris Cooper's teeth in Adaptation
* The three seashells


* Amelie's powers of observation
* Jo-Go!
* Floyd and his Honey Bear
* Coming-of-age stories
* The gifts that keep on giving: The Karate Kid films(Macchio)
* Noticing something new with each viewing of Fight Club
* "Playing football at West Canaan may have been the opportunity of your lifetime, but I don't want…your life!!"


* Jon Voight in Anaconda
* Paul Newman dressing someone down
* Dystopian movies
* Wes Anderson's attention to detail
* "Remember remember the fifth of November; Gunpowder, treason and plot.; I know of no reason why gunpowder, treason; Should ever be forgot…"
* Min-sik Choi's hair in Oldboy
* The opening credits of Catch Me If You Can
* The closing credits of Dazed and Confused
* Insane, French trapeze artists
* Crossing movies off my "haven't seen" list
* Meeting my "blog" friends for real
* My awesome movie-going partner
* Javier Bardem's No Country haircut
* "7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 dwarves. 7, man, that's the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch."
* Ordell Robbie
* Watching the audience watch THE scene in 127 Hours
* Harkins Theaters
* That you're reading this

And then...

The Desert Island CD Blog-a-thon

About a year ago, bloggers from all over the world took part in the Desert Island DVD blog-a-thon hosted by Fandango Groovers Movie Blog. It was a smashing success and a fun exercise, in which we were forced to select eight DVDs to take to our desert island, knowing those would be the last we'd be able to watch for all time. This was my entry.

Smart feller that he is - and fresh off of a post about the "52 Most Iconic Use of Pop Songs in Movies" post, which no doubt inspired this idea - Castor Troy of Anomalous Material decided it was time for a similar challenge. Namely, the title you see above. Here are the details:

"The concept is very simple, you are stranded on a desert island with only one CD (and a CD player etc...). What are 12 tracks that you would want to have with you? While those can be pop song, instrumentals etc... we are all movie bloggers so there is one requirement that each track comes from a movie soundtrack. Of course, you should give a little blurb for each to explain why as well as try to post YouTubes if possible/necessary."

The official post, where you can find links to everyone else's lists, is here: http://www.anomalousmaterial.com/movies/2011/03/desert-island-cd/

Longtime readers of Blog Cabins won't be surprised to see a number of the songs I've chosen, as I've put them up here (or on Facebook) from time to time - songs that give me inspiration of one sort or another. The ones you've not seen, though, will fit the same mold: songs that I could listen to time and time again - I should hope so, since they'll be all that I have. I wonder how much of it is coincidence that more than half are instrumental - perhaps they're just more timeless to my ears. Here they be, in no special order:

1. First, some of the familiar. Yes, I'm a dead sucker for the accordion. I'm also deathly in love with Amelie. Combine the two (and some beautiful work by Yann Tiersen) and you get the theme song, "La Valse D'Amelie."



2. I gave Castor trouble for putting this song on his "Iconic" list, since (shamefully) it was featured very little in the actual film. Still, it's there, and it's the best damn song on The Matrix soundtrack by a country mile: Rob Dougan's "Clubbed to Death." Blast this song as loud as you can, every time - it only makes it better.



3. That one's a bit heavy, so how 'bout something a little lighter? Hans Zimmer's "You're So Cool," aka the True Romance theme.



4. Before you get freaked out by all these instrumental tracks, here are some lyrics and singing for you. An older track that I'd all but forgotten about until I saw Adventureland, I fell back in love with INXS (well, especially this track) after hearing "Don't Change" through older ears. Quite possibly my favorite song from the early 80s, and I'm shocked at how well it ages. Awesome song to close out the film, to boot.



5. This portion of Beethoven's 7th might well be a cliched movie song at this point, but I really don't care (for the record, I'm choosing its use in The Fall). It's stunningly gorgeous, and builds to an awesome crescendo. I dare you not to like it.



6. Speaking of crescendos, this song works its way to its climax with such mastery. As I've stated elsewhere, if I ever had to run through a wall, I would listen to this Trevor Jones' Last of the Mohicans epic "Promontory" as preparation. Also used to great effect in an epic Nike football commercial some years back.



7. Next up is one that I know will be a popular pick - heck, I already saw it on one list (at The List, appropriately). It's the song that managed to make Fight Club even cooler than we thought it could be, ending the film with mucho gusto: The Pixies' "Where Is My Mind?"



8. Another song with a sweeping crescendo? You bet. And besides, what good is a movie song list without some Clint Mansell. Perhaps his most famous and loved song to date, The Fountain's "Death Is the Road to Awe."



9. Okay, so I'm not exactly the biggest Smiths fan, but this is a treeeemendous choice, and I'll tell you why. First, it's a great song (naturally), being put to extensive use in a favorite from the last few years - (500) Days of Summer. But that's not the genius move. The best part - noticeable to those with a good audio memory - is that this song serves double duty, as The Dream Academy (yeah, who?) had their (instrumental) cover version used in Ferris Bueller's Day Off (the museum scene). I'll be honest, nostalgia and sentimentality actually have me enjoying that one more, but I'll give a nod to the original.



10. The Beach is not a great movie. Ambitious and pretty good, but like many a Danny Boyle flick, it goes off the rails in the last act. Nevertheless, I have a soft spot for it for perfectly showcasing (and perhaps introducing me to?) Moby's "Porcelain." Shut up - I don't care if you don't think it's cool to like Moby songs anymore.



11. How could I not have a song from one of the greatest soundtracks of all time (and one of my top three movies)? Quentin Tarantino's Pulp Fiction. But then...which song to use? I could choose any of about eight of them, but Urge Overkill's cover of Neil Diamond's "Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon" barely edges out Chuck Berry (probably the only regard in which they can say that). Personifies cool.



12.Damnit, just one spot left. What to choose?!?! I could easily go for some Donnie Darko ("Mad World") or double up by taking Fiona Apple's cover of The Beatles "Across the Universe" (Pleasantville), but in the end, I'm taking The Who's "A Quick One While He's Away." It might not even be my favorite song on the Rushmore soundtrack (there are many to choose from), but it's a great pick for a few reasons. One, I don't want short songs, really - if I'm stuck with one CD, punk music is off the table, as a 32-minute disc would just end up pissing me off more than anything. But not only is this track nearly nine minutes, it's like six songs in one, what with all of the transitions. Plus, I need another nod to classic rock, and I could stand to listen to this more and more. "We have a remedy!" (See how I snuck honorable mentions in there, too?)



Too instrumental for you? Just right? At the least, how 'bout that representation of films? Let me hear your thoughts on my Desert Island CD in the comments.

And then...

Grading the Movie Studio Logos - Part III: The Subsidiaries

This is the third in a continuing series in which I analyze and grade the openers that we film fans should be intimately familiar with. After all, we see them in front of every movie, and what with co-distributions and production houses each getting to put their own in front of the credits, we're seeing more and more of them than ever (sometimes as many as four or five!).

In part I, I took a look at the "Big Six" studios - go here to see how they were judged. In part II, I graded the "Minor League" studios (Lions Gate, Dreamworks, etc.). Here, I look at the baby arms of the big guns - the subsidiaries. There used to be even more of these, but a crappy economy and/or a re-thinking of the philosophy led to some being shuttered, a la Warned Independent. Still, there are plenty left.

Keep an eye out for the last (planned) post in this series, in which I'll look at some miscellaneous production companies (Relativity Media, Legendary Pictures). But now, the subsidiaries.

What do these openers tell us, and how effectively do they tell it?

FOCUS FEATURES (Subsidiary, Universal)
(Ok, this first one's a cheat, since I included it as a bonus in part I. But for posterity...)

What it says: "We're not like all the other guys out there."

How effectively does it say it?: I'm biased here. Their lineup isn't perfect by any means, but I swear, if I see that Focus logo, I feel like I'm guaranteed an interesting movie, if not a great one. They have an excellent track record of taking chances on original fare, and their logo only serves to support that record, giving the viewer a much different animal to start their film with.

General comments: OMG! No clouds in a studio logo? Who let them get away with that?!?!

Overall grade: A


FOX SEARCHLIGHT (Subsidiary, 20th Century Fox)

What it says: "FOX FOX FOX FOX FOX...searchlight."

How effectively does it say it?: I feel like this deserves an "Incomplete." It's one thing to evoke the spirit, or even look, of your parent company. It's another to produce what is in essence a carbon copy of said parent's iconography.

General comments: It's certainly more understated, and the flash of light at the end is a nice touch that gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling about the studio. But based off a lack of originality, I can't go higher than a...

Overall grade: C+


SONY PICTURES CLASSICS (Subsidiary, Columbia)

What it says: "Sony Pictures Classics." And not much else. Perhaps, "We're the stark division of the corporate giant; come visit our office to see nothing but white, black, and silver modern furniture and trappings. And it's very cold in here, like a museum."

How effectively does it say it?: Well, the "what this says" is probably more in the eye of the beholder than any other opener I've looked at. It's a friggin' blue screen with a line with no motion that lasts for mere seconds (though I swear the line used to draw itself across from left to right; I suppose that was just too wild and crazy for the folks at SPC). One can only draw so much from the font selection, a line, and a color. What do you think it says and how effectively does it say it?

General comments: Here's where I throw you a curve: I quite like the opener for SPC. Make no mistake, it's plain as hell, and to be honest, I'm not sure if I like all that many movies that SPC puts out. But I can tell you one thing - when I see that logo before a trailer, I would bet money that the movie I'm about to see snippets of will be from Europe and not in English. It will be lauded on the festival circuit and have a minimal theatrical release stateside. It will feature characters speaking in hushed tones and/or be about a rural Chinese village and/or be tied to the Holocaust. Mostly, it will be "good" but unappealing to me (usually; ironically, the one shown here is for a movie I love to death - Run Lola Run). So even though it says very little, it says a lot.

Overall grade: B+


PARAMOUNT VANTAGE (Subsidiary, Paramount)

What it says: "We're on the people, man...see, we used to work in retail, too."

How effectively does it say it?: To be honest, I'm not sure that that's what this one is supposed to be saying at all. It gives me some kind of hipster vibe that I can't explain. And the more I think about it, the more it dawns on me that I haven't seen the kind of tagging gun that makes those...things...in forever, making me wonder how many people in the audience even recognize what the words "Paramount Vantage" are being 'printed' on. It's all very confusing.

General comments: Weird - I could have sworn that the one that can be found at 1:38 in this video was still being used, but that one is for Paramount Classics. Kind of a shame - I dug the way that one took the familiar (a la Fox Searchlight) but where Fox simply mimicked theirs, Paramount added what they saw as a touch of class of history. Similar, yet different. It wasn't great, but it was at least distinctive. Then again, this one for Paramount Vantage is decidedly outside the box.

Overall grade: B- (To be honest, I'm not sure how I feel about this one at all.)


PIXAR (Subsidiary, Disney)

What it says: "Aren't we playful and just sickeningly adorable?"

How effectively does it say it?: I recall watching a documentary about Pixar, and in it they talked about the how and why of a desk lamp becoming this icon in their logo, but for the life of me, I can't figure out why it is. I suppose it's irrelevant what the object is, though; the thing to glean from this is a phenomenon that Pixar has pounded into our heads over and over for the last decade or so: they can take the ignored, the inanimate and make them magical.

General comments: On the whole, considering the dynamics of their films, one could argue that this is a pretty plain opener, and one would probably be right. I'd expect something more on the level of Disney's bombastic castle opener by this point, but Pixar has stuck to their roots and kept it low key. Sickeningly, this just makes me like it and them even more. It's not perfect, but it's getting a higher grade than it probably should.

Overall grade: A-


NEW LINE CINEMA (Subsidiary, Warner Brothers)

What it says: Uhhh...let me get back to you on this one...

How effectively does it say it?: I don't know. Five pieces of film (three of which disappear) and a rectangle. I have no friggin' clue as to what this thing is supposed to signify or how it's supposed to make me feel. They like 3D??

General comments: And yet, I don't hate this thing. I suppose it's owing to their legacy of making youth-oriented films (which pretty much remained intact from their founding in 1967 through about 1994), but I feel some sort of affinity and nostalgia when I see their logo that I can't otherwise explain. It's nonsense, but I don't dislike it.
Overall grade: C+


DIMENSION (Unit, The Weinstein Company)

What it says: "Dimension...is groovin' along"

How effectively does it say it?: See below.

General comments: I need a handwriting analyst. Isn't there something that says that reverse italicized text means that you're crazy or a serial killer? How fitting, then, that Dimension should use said font, since they're the Miramax arm run by Bob Weinstein known for genre films above all else. Still, for a branch of film not known for holding back, it's odd that their chief mainstream studio has such a subdued logo/opener.

Overall grade: C-

And then...

Fletch's Favored Five: Quentin Tarantino Scenes

Quentin Tarantino has a gift for creating memorable scenes. The only problem is that this creates a paradox of sorts. He creates so many terrific scenes that, when called to narrow them down to a list of five, there's too much to choose from, leading me to think like The Incredibles' Dash: "If they're all special, then none of them are special."

But we know that's not the case. How can they be narrowed down, though? Pulp Fiction alone has about 30 scenes that might make this list; conversely, I love Jackie Brown and think it's solid from front-to-back, yet can't think of too many scenes in it that stand apart from their brethren. And though I've seen all of his films (and True Romance will be counted for the purpose of this list), there are some I have much more experience with than others, and I don't want to shut them out based solely on that.

5. Stuntman Mike's first act of destruction (Death Proof)


It's no wonder I couldn't find any pictures of this scene, since a) it happens quickly and b) it's pretty gruesome. But Death Proof is a slow burn, and this moment occurs at just about the midway point, and boy is it an OMG! moment if ever there was one, shocking the movie with a million gigawatts of electricity.

4. The Basement scene (Inglourious Basterds)


Of all of Tarantino's scenes, this most famous one from his more recent work seems to be the one that's the true test of whether or not someone really digs what Quentin is serving. A long, funny, tense setup...you know it's gonna end badly (much like the initial farmhouse scene), but you have no idea in hell when that's gonna happen.

3. "English, motherf#%^er, do you speak it?!?!" (Pulp Fiction)


I'll tell you right now, there are two Pulp Fiction scenes on here. I'm leaving off some of his most beloved films altogether. Of course, as I stated above, though, that's not the problem; the problem is all of the scenes in Pulp that could make the list that aren't going to. This, however, is probably amongst the most beloved and oft-quoted that their is...but not enough to top my list.

2. "You're a cantaloupe!" (True Romance)


Two acting heavyweights, going toe-to-toe with life on the line. Notice that theme popping up again? We all knew how this scene was going to end, but Tarantino took us to places surprising and hilarious first.

1. Jack Rabbit Slims (Pulp Fiction)


You might be saying "What?!?!" It's true, compared to the adrenaline scene or perhaps the finale in the diner or Bruce and Marsellus' trip to the L.A. underground, this is a subdued scene that really does little to move the plot forward. But this was the moment in the film that took it to another level in terms of pop culture, imbibing it with a timelessness and kitsch factor that set it apart from every other mobster movie out there. If I had to pinpoint the moment that I fell head over heels in love with Pulp, this was it.

And then...

Grading the Movie Studio Logos - Part II: The Minor Leagues

This is the second in a continuing series in which I analyze and grade the openers that we film fans should be intimately familiar with. After all, we see them in front of every movie, and what with co-distributions and production houses each getting to put their own in front of the credits, we're seeing more and more of them than ever (sometimes as many as four or five!).

In part I, I took a look at the "Big Six" studios - go here to see how they were judged. Here, I look at the "mini-majors," those studios that gobble up much of the remaining 15% that the six don't command. In future posts, I'll look at subsidiaries of the six (Focus, Fox Searchlight) and film production companies (Relativity Media, Legendary Pictures). But now, the mini-majors. What do these openers tell us, and how effectively do they tell it?

SUMMIT

What it says: "Get it? Summit?"

How effectively does it say it?: It sure as shit doesn't say much, but I guess it says what it says pretty well.

General comments: BOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRIIIIIINNNNNG.

Also, go ahead and name a Summit film, I dare you. Hard to believe they're a top 10 studio - they have no identity that I'm aware of. Come to find out, the only reason they're in that top 10 is because they nabbed the Twilight series. I guess they are/are going to be a more major player in the future.

Overall grade: D-

LIONS GATE

What it says: "We are trying our hardest to look like one of the big boys."

How effectively does it say it?: I think they are kind of succeeding in that regard. It's definitely more "epic" than their old one, which was slightly less boring than that Summit one. It's got the horns and the clouds - apparently, two items mandated by the Movie Studio Logo Intro Committee, so they're headed in the right direction on that front.

General comments: A tad overcomplicated, no?

For whatever reason, I've always liked Lions Gate, even though they tend to make a lot of genre films, which aren't typically my bag. For a while a few years back, I toyed with the idea of buying stock in them, mostly because it was (and still is) pretty cheap (~$6.00/share) and I liked the idea of owning stock in a movie studio. Of course, that's neither here nor there.

Anyway, I guess I'm glad they actually worked in a gate with lions on it. Literal as that may be, at least it makes sense. What they came up with, though, reminds me of Hellboy II or Harry Potter.

Overall grade: B-

DREAMWORKS (Note: I'm kind of cheating here; the live-action studio isn't its own company anymore, having been purchased by Paramount. The animation division is still independent, but their logo is essentially an alternate of this one, and this one is much more widely known.)

What it says: "Don't we remind you of the wonders and nostalgia of childhood?"

How effectively does it say it?: Much to the sure surprise and chagrin of some, I've never really liked DreamWorks' opener. It's too long, too homey, and the music kind of grates on me. But yes, it does, in its way, effectively get across its message, all the while subtly reminding us that Steven Spielberg was a founder, via the moon imagery that he's co-opted ever since E.T. and starting up Amblin Entertainment.

General comments: Does anyone else think "Ron Howard circa The Andy Griffith Show" every time they see that kid fishing? Cause I sure do.

Overall grade: C

THE WEINSTEIN COMPANY

What it says: "We're still pissed we can't use our old company name and logo. Doesn't this one remind you of it?"

How effectively does it say it?: The color scheme is there. The "W" kind of looks like buildings if you squint just right. Additionally, the format of the "W" is a bit reminiscent of the Fox spotlights, though that's neither here nor there.

General comments: It doesn't scream "movies!," but it's kind of the antithesis of DreamWorks' opener - classy, short, and to the point. And I like the music. It's far from the best, and I did prefer the old Miramax opener, but this'll do, donkey.

Overall grade: B

OVERTURE (Note: ignore the singing; this is the best version of their logo I could get.)

What it says: "A Starz Company."

How effectively does it say it?: It even says that poorly.

General comments: I don't care if Overture is new to the game and/or affiliated with like 14 other brands (Starz, Anchor Bay), this is one weak logo and opener. It says absolutely nothing about itself or movies, aside from "we like rainbows." Ditch it...now.

Overall grade: F

MGM

What it says: "You see that shit next to the laurels? That's FILM, mothertrucker! We old school, and we ain't changin' shit anytime soon (except the lion, which we change often)."

How effectively does it say it?: MGM's financial struggles are well-known, but I don't know if there's a much more iconic opener than this one. That's not to say it's the best, but it's been around (virtually unchanged) forever and indeed screams "movies!" like no other. It also screams "We only make James Bond movies anymore," unfortunately. Hard to believe one of the bigger boys hasn't gobbled MGM up, for their name brand and recognition if nothing else.

General comments: No, I don't really know what a lion has to do with movies, either, but I'm sure there's a historical reason for it. Does it matter, though?

Overall grade: A-

And then...

Fletch's Favored Five: Stars in need of a heel turn

When the bloom is off the rose, when we've seen the hero save the damsel in distress time and time again, it becomes time to try something new.

Often, stars turn to villainous roles because that's all they have left in them - Val Kilmer, for a number of reasons, just isn't the same viable leading man (or even sidekick) that he was as few as ten years ago. Thus, he becomes the evil Dieter Von Cunth in MacGruber. Tom Cruise was Hollywood's #1 "face" for more than a decade, but when the prime roles started drying up, he turned to more nefarious work and found a heaping of critical acclaim that wasn't always there in the past (Collateral, Tropic Thunder, Lions for Lambs). Harrison Ford was tremendous in the underloved What Lies Beneath...Robert DeNiro scared us all to death in The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle Cape Fear and The Untouchables, and has embraced his heel turns, evident in such fare as Machete.

You get the point. Most times, a change of pace is needed simply because we (and possibly them as well) have grown tired of seeing them play the same kinds of roles. Other times, a change comes about due to events in the star's real life (Robert Downey, Jr. was perfect for a bad guy run after all his zany misadventures; if only U.S. Marshalls had been a better overall vehicle). But mostly, it's due to a combination of the first reason thrown together with age. They get wrinkled and/or fat, and suddenly, the studios no longer want them to play the leads (not surprisingly).

So, who is due for a juicy villain role, and who do we think would excel given the opportunity? The ground rules I tried to limit myself to was this:

* A-lister, or close enough to it. People that aren't quite on the radar yet make their dough playing villains often. For a prime example, see Jeremy Renner in S.W.A.T. or Adam Scott in Torque (on second thought, perhaps you don't want to see those after all).

* Said star hasn't played a villain previously, or at least not since getting famous. George Clooney (our resident example for the next few points) might have played the bad guy in Return of the Killer Tomatoes (which I doubt he did), but it wouldn't count anyway since no one knew who he was at the time. (See above ground rule.)

* Assholes don't count; only villains do. Intolerable Cruelty, Burn After Reading...George was no villain. Imperfect yes, but that's it. We get into kind of a gray area with anithero roles like in From Dusk Till Dawn, but no one can convince me that that's a proper heel turn, either.

* I haven't seen every movie ever made and can only do so much research. If Clooney was the tabbed by his pal Robert Rodriguez to cameo as a villain in Spy Kids, well, you'll just have to excuse me not not knowing that. Besides, I'm talking HIGH profile villains here - think Collateral or Cage/Travolta in Face/Off. Just correct me if I'm wrong.


Honorable mentions:

* Brad Pitt - I so wanted to put him not only on the list, but at the top. However, even I couldn't b.s. myself out of knowing that between Early Grayce and Tyler Durden, he's played a villain in one form or another. He's also played antiheroes a number of times.

* Jennifer Aniston - Just do something different, Jen. Why not a bitchy role in the Miranda Priestley vein?

* Adam Sandler - he can certainly look scary (Zohan), and he loves to do accents. Marry the two and don't smirk at the end for the kiddies.

* Orlando Bloom - He's in need of a career resurgence - why not give it a shot?

The Favored Five

5. George Clooney

Hey, whaddaya know - it's like we've been here before! Anyway, most recently, we saw Clooney turn off his million-watt smile for a quiet role as a hit man in The American. We know the guy can act, and we know the guy can overact when he wants to (Intolerable Cruelty again). I'd love to see him throw on an accent and really turn the screws on someone.

4. Natalie Portman

So typecast as the virginal goody-two-shoes is Ms. Portman that she took a role in which that was the major arc for her character. Better yet, I think she could actually pull it off quite nicely, either by playing up her girlie charms and then stabbing the hero in the back or by playing it straight with the intensity she showed at the end of Black Swan.

3. Hugh Jackman

Not too dissimilar from my number one choice, Jackman is in dire need of some edge. Sure, he brings some of it to the role of Wolverine, but never has there been a cuddlier vermin than there is inhabited by Mr. Song and Dance. He can snarl and flare his nostrils all he wants, but we know the pearly whites that lie beneath.

2. Keanu Reeves

Came close in The Gift - he was definitely an asshole and a character that nobody liked, but a) it wasn't seen by hardly anyone, b) it wasn't that type of movie, and c) if it were, he wasn't the main baddie. That said, if you've seen it - along with pieces of The Devil's Advocate - you know that Reeves more than has the chops to pull it off. And, for a number of reasons, don't you dare mention The Day the Earth Stood Still...

1. Will Smith

There was some talk not long ago of Smith playing Cain in a film titled, creatively, The Legend of Cain, in which he would take down Abel, but there's no record of the film on his IMDb page, and the last bit of chatter about it was in July of last year. And yet, is there a more golden boy (man) in all of Hollywood right now? True, he hasn't been in much lately, but when he has, he hits big, and is this generation's equivalent of Tom Cruise if ever there was one. It's time to go sinister, Fresh Prince. Just ask Family Guy:

And then...

Grading the Movie Studio Logo Openers - Part I: The Big Boys

Like most movie geeks out there, I get giddy at the sight of many a movie studio's animated logo sequence before the start of a film. Although some may say that it's merely a meaningless logo, those who work in or have studied the graphic arts (or perhaps live in close proximity to someone that does) know that logos are powerful instruments that can build up or tear down companies. Additionally, they each speak volumes about not only the companies themselves but about the products that the companies deliver to you. If I were to sit you down in front of a TV and start the DVD player without telling you which movie you were watching, there's a chance you'd be able to tell me a little bit about the film you're about to see merely by seeing the logo. Don't believe me? What comes to mind when I say "Dimension Films?" Genre films, perhaps? The sight of the Pixar logo would not only tell you that you're in line for an animated film, but also that you're all but guaranteed of seeing a film of the highest quality. And I know I'm not the only one that grew up thinking the Fox theme music was tied to Star Wars.

Of course, not all of the studio openers can bring about such a rush of emotions or ties to specific genres. The fact is, they're just too big and release too many films to carry such a tie. They all go through ups and downs (Warner Bros. was the market share leader in 2009, with 20.1%, according to Wikipedia), so there's no real distinction there. Of the six (and aside from the Star Wars tie to so many twenty-, thirty- and forty-somethings), I'd say only Disney carries a real emotional bond, as well as being the only one where the sight of their logo gives an indication as to the type of film you're in for.

But we're not here to analyze the place in the market for each of the half dozen studios or their histories. We're here to grade their logo openers - what do they tell us, and how effectively do they tell it? I'll rank these in terms of their position in the market, just for the hell of it:

WARNER BROTHERS

What it says: "We're classy, and we remember our roots. Also, we're capable of levitation."

How effectively does it say it?: Good and bad. By playing "As Time Goes By" at the beginning of the clip, it reminds those who can or want to recall that "We are the studio responsible for Casablanca." But I wonder if those unfamiliar with what a studio lot looks like from above really can tell what's going on in those two seconds of screen time, especially with the ripple effect layed over it. Warner's logo hasn't changed all that much over the years, so the shield logo plays up the history of the brand even further.

General comments: Why is the lot reflected in the side of the shield? There's a lot of information packed into 14 seconds. Also, Warner gets points for letting the theme of the film often shape the look of their logo. (Think Inception or Watchmen.)

Overall grade: B+

20th CENTURY FOX

What it says: "We're located in Los Angeles - see Hollywood in the background?" "Come to us, now - please!" "Planes can't fly over us." "We're big-time - better get your VIP tickets if you

How effectively does it say it?: As you can probably tell, I'm a bit torn as to what exactly the 20th opening is saying. Certainly it comes across as regal, and attempts to puff itself up by panning to make the, uh, icon thingy appear larger than it is by shooting it from below at the end. But beyond that, it kind of reminds me of that line from True Romance - you know, it shows me everything but tells me nothing. Unfortunately, True Romance was put out by Warner.

General comments: It's sure hard to overcome that Star Wars tie.

Overall grade: B-

PARAMOUNT

What it says: Aside from the obvious literal translation, the hell if I know. But it's a hell of a lot better than this gawdawful thing.

How effectively does it say it?: It says "Paramount," that's for sure. I had to go to Wikipedia to learn the meaning of the stars.

General comments: First impression was, "Wow, I can't remember the last time I actually heard that music. Paramount must always let the film's score/soundtrack play over their logo." Perhaps not the best idea.

This one, too, has a strong sentimental tie, this time to the Indiana Jones films, where Spielberg cleverly began each film with a mountain or hill that closely resembled the Paramount mountain.

Overall grade: C-

COLUMBIA

What it says: "We're ripoff artists with no creativity."

How effectively does it say it?: Well, it says Statue of Liberty no matter how you spin it. The fact that she used to have the American flag draped around her and just some blue sheet is a step in the right direction, I think. I would have assumed the change to her blue drape occurred when Sony bought the company, but it actually changed years before that.

General comments: My brother worked at Sony for a short time in the 90s, so I have a small tie to them, as receiving swag (A Last Action Hero hat! A Cliffhanger t-shirt!) was pretty cool to the 13-year old me. But that feeling has pretty much faded. This one's a stinker, and the old Tri-Star one (their now-defunct - at least form film distribution - sister company) wasn't a much better variant of essentially the same thing.

Overall grade: D

DISNEY

What it says: "Hey, remember all that fun you had at Disneyland/world over the years? Well, here's 90 more minutes of it."

How effectively does it say it?: Pretty damn well. Space Mountain doesn't make an appearance here, but it might as well. The Disney castle is iconic in just about any form. Playing "When You Wish Upon a Star" is right up there - if not better - than Warner's "As Time Goes By," as it evokes not only nostalgia to a time gone by, but childhood as well.

General comments: I've never liked how the lake and plain fields continue in front of the castle. I want Main Street to be there, damnit!

Overall grade: A

UNIVERSAL

What it says: "We'll be expanding past Earth any day now."

How effectively does it say it?: Like many of the others, it proclaims "we're big and you're small" loud and clear. Other than that, I'm torn - I dig the music here, but the visuals...no matter how many times they spruce up this logo, it's still pretty boring, and I still think it looks outdated for it's version of Earth. They need to go more photographic. I know I'm not exactly talking about how effective their message is here, but that's only because the message seems simple, and I get it already.

General comments: See above.

Overall grade: C


Bonus! I'll be recapping this one again when I get to the smaller arms of these Big Six, but this one's a favorite.

FOCUS FEATURES

What it says: "We're not like all the other guys out there."

How effectively does it say it?: I'm biased here. Their lineup isn't perfect by any means, but I swear, if I see that Focus logo, I feel like I'm guaranteed an interesting movie, if not a great one. They have an excellent track record of taking chances on original fare, and their logo only serves to support that record, giving the viewer a much different animal to start their film with.

General comments: OMG! No clouds in a studio logo? Who let them get away with that?!?!

Overall grade: A

And then...

Fletch's Favored Five: Wordless Lebowski Gags

You could say that it's easy to come up with a list of quotes from The Big Lebowski, given that there are so many to choose from. You could also say that it's damn near impossible to narrow such a list of quotes to your favorite five or ten, given that there are so many to choose from. I have wisely skipped over that task altogether, instead coming up with my favorite sight gags and other non-verbal jokes from the Coen brothers' epic stoner comedy.


5. Ranked the lowest because it really has little to do with the film outside of being a great example of awesome set design; the Coens had nothing to do with this image and, aside from the bowling aspect, it has nothing to do with the events of the film. But, c'mon, that's just a funny shot.


4. Works so great because, the first time you saw the flick, this was a sick-yet-funny image. But then, some 30 minutes into the film, you were given the background of one Jesus Quintana...and it immediately got a whole lot sicker. Ewww.


3. "Are you employed, sir?!?"



2. I love Jackie Treehorn's pervy drawing not so much for the content of it (which is admittedly funny), but for the fact that the audience gets to situate themselves in the exact frame of mind as The Dude upon first seeing it. Total bewilderment. Treehorn's look of intensity as he's creating it ain't half-bad, either.


1. You can't altogether see it from this image, but this is from one of the opening shots of the film, as we settle in on The Dude at his favorite grocery store - Ralph's - purchasing a half-gallon of milk (for the Caucasians, of course!). And that's all he buys. Naturally, he writes a check...for 69 cents. (Also notable is the fact that the date on the check is 9/11, but that's not particularly funny, just kind of a "huh" moment after the fact.)

And then...

LAMBcast #33

Before we get to this episode, a minor rant. You'll pardon me if I sound like a whining ninny, but what the heck, man? I know for a fact that more than just the (getting long) list of people that have recorded a LAMBcast are listening to it, and yet with each new episode, the comments seem to evaporate more and more. So, if you're listening, and you love, hate, are indifferent, or just have some general feedback, let's hear it, either here or sent to blogcabins@yahoo.com! We're dancing like monkeys and barely getting a nickel to show for it. End rant - thank you.


Their mission, should they choose to accept it (they did): Bring a random Top 5 to the recording of LAMBcast #33. Note to self: do this again soon sometime, and be sure that you're there for the recording. In other words, some great lists here, not only in the movies that were chosen, but in the lists that these five guys came up with. They were a bit psyched for it, so it took a bit longer than usual (1 hr 23 mins), but I think it's worth it. In on the fun were Nick, Jason, James, Kai, and, in his first time hosting (be gentle), Sebastian.

The lists were then topped off with two surprising games of LLS games and some Trailer Talk about Sucker Punch and Monsters.

As usual, the music, as provided royalty-free by Kevin MacLeod's Incompetech website, is the bomb. Big thanks to Kevin for providing this service.

Also, we're still on iTunes, and would still love a review, even if it's a bad one. Thanks for listening!

FYI: I started a dedicated Facebook page for the LAMBcast. I'll still post something here when a new episode is released, but if you're looking for a central place for commentary, suggestions, complaints, etc., go here.

And then...

Fletch's Favored Five: 1997 in Film

Now, the third in a continuing series in which I count down my favorites from a particular year in film.

I'm going to use my friend Wikipedia to kickstart my brain, year by year, and I'll throw out a Favored Five here and there. If you want to refresh your memory in a similar fashion, just go to Wiki and type "[four-character year] in film." Here's the one for 1997. I won't pretend that Wiki is the end-all, be-all of filmic knowledge or that these yearly lists are 100% accurate, but they're an excellent place to start and a great resource.

1997
I was 20 for most of 1997. Not coincidentally, the thing I noticed most while scanning the list of films that came out that year was, "Damn, I think I've seen them all...and multiple times!" I guess something about being in college yet not being the legal drinking age just yet leads to increased movie viewing amongst film geeks. It's also possible that I was living in a house with a coughillegalcough cable box at the time and I watched the same films time and again just because they were there and free. But I could be mistaken about that.

Potentially also tied in with that whole "I watched a ton of these, and multiple times" thing is my thinking that 1997 was a pretty damn good one for movies - not a ton of great prestige flicks, but loads of very good-great ones. In other words, time has been good to 1997.

Notable movies not yet seen:
The Apostle
The Full Monty
Princess Mononoke
The Sweet Hereafter
Wag the Dog

Honorable Mentions
Anaconda (the guiltiest of pleasures)
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
Chasing Amy
Grosse Point Blank
Starship Troopers (guilty, but an awesome satire as well)

5. Good Will Hunting - Here's how you know I have problems: I spent a good five minutes debating what would place in this position. I couldn't make up my mind between this, Grosse Point Blank, and Chasing Amy. In the end, the inclusion of some terrific songs by Elliott Smith, the knowledge that this is the film that truly launched Matt Damon and the fact that Gus Van Sant's film is the most complete were enough to overcome the others.

4. Men in Black - I haven't done a comparison, but this has got to be my favorite of all of the tent pole, mega-budget blockbusters that have been released over the last 15 years. Director Barry Sonnenfeld was just off of Sunday's SGC flick (Get Shorty) with the Addams Family flicks not far behind in his rear-view mirror as well. So what does he do? Gets Will Smith, blazing hot after ID4 and Tommy Lee Jones, not far removed from his Oscar win from The Fugitive. That trio, combined with a crackerjack script, some great CGI (for the day) and a deep supporting cast (Rip Torn, Linda Fiorentino, Vincent D'Onofrio) were enough to win critical kudos all-around and box office success to the tune of #2 for 1997, trailing only overall leader Titanic.

3. Gattaca - Writer/director Andrew Niccol was supposed to be the Next Big Thing. This sci-fi murder mystery/drama about DNA was a cricital hit and his next project was The Truman Show. Then the wheels came off, in the form of the bomb S1m0ne and the almost-universally panned The Terminal. Lord of War made for a slight comeback, but he hasn't been seen since...until this year, when his The Cross, with Orlando Bloom, will be released. One can only hope he eventually finds the potential that Gattaca hinted at.

2. Jackie Brown - Right away, I knew that this and the eventual number one were my top two for 1997. The only question was in what order. Ultimately, for all of my love for Jackie, from the resurrections of Pam Grier and Robert Forster (and even Michael Keaton, to some extent) to the soundtrack to the slow burn pace that Tarantino used to maximum effect, I had to give the top spot to...

1. Boogie Nights - ...Paul Thomas Anderson's crowning achievement (or is that spot reserved for There Will Be Blood?). Boogie is a pop culture behemoth. An epic tale that really doesn't tell all that much of a story, but rather lets you be a fly on the wall of Jack Horner's living room, getting to know a carnival of characters and letting you watch one of the tracking shots this side of Children of Men that no one seems to talk about anymore (the pool party). This is Altman-esque filmmaking at its finest, perhaps even finer than the player himself.

And then...

The Really Drawn-out Blog Cabins Decennial Spectacular: #1

Decennial, in case you're not hip to the term, means: 1. relating to or lasting for ten years, or 2. occurring every ten years. It's really a word that we should hear more often. Anyway, this will be my series where I count down my favorites from the last decade, and since I don't plan on it taking 10 years to finish, we're going to go with the second definition.

Previous day's posts:
12/21: Intro/#10: Idiocracy
12/22: #9: Children of Men
12/23: #8: Pan's Labyrinth
12/24: #7: Wall*E
12/26: #6: Memento
12/27: #5: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
12/28: #4: The Royal Tenenbaums
12/29: #3: Amelie
12/30: #2: There Will Be Blood

Number 1 on the RD-oBCDS is...

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
With a bullet. I mean, not even close. Astute readers might recall that in my Top 50 films that I posted a little over a year ago, there were only two from this decade in the first chunk of ten, and this was the higher of the two (I didn't assign numbers, and interestingly enough, my Decennial #2 is nowhere to be found on the entire list; either I was still digesting it or made an oversight). Additionally, Eternal Sunshine was one of the movies I listed as one of my favorites in the LAMB's first-ever post. You read and perfectly retained the info given in both those posts, right?

Almost since the day I saw it, Michel Gondry's near-perfect film vaulted itself into my vaunted Top 3 (an impossible to separate trio that includes Pulp Fiction and Fight Club, with Fletch coming in a sentimental fourth). Inventive, funny, heartbreaking, creepy, sexy - pick an adjective, they all apply in spades.

Take a look at the complete Decennial Top 10 I've posted and you'll notice a very similar theme that runs through many of them: they are the works of tireless creatives that weren't satisfied with merely telling a story that existed in the reality we inhabit. Rather, they constructed whole new worlds in their films and filled them with intricate, intimate details that left the viewer's eyes (or at least this viewer) wide-eyed and struggling to catch up to all that had been laid out in front of them. A depressing America some 500 years into the future filled with morons (at best). An equally depressing (for altogether different reasons) planet just 20 years from now that needs but a single tweak (infertility) to wreak havoc on a global scale. The imagination of a pre-teen girl inhabited by monsters and fairies. A depressing America some 500 years into the future filled with morons (at best)...and robots. The blackboard of a mind of Leonard Shelby. Middle Earth! The Salinger-esque universe that occupies the head of Wes Anderson, complete with jumpsuit-attired millionaires and the fathers that abandoned them. A Paris so clean and picturesque it left real Parisians livid with Jean-Pierre Jeunet. And perhaps the lone exception, an all-too real version of the world of the early 1900s dominated by tycoons and baptist preachers.

Finally, there is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, a movie that takes its audience and characters so far into the rabbit hole that we all forget that there was even a hole there to begin with. Faceless characters, worlds disappearing before our eyes - it's as if screenwriter Charlie Kauffman and Gondry dropped us into a human-sized ant farm and then shook it up until all the tunnels and patterns became jumbled and unrecognizable. So we waded through it all, and what did we find? That the world they had made was perhaps better than the one we were in to begin with.


What's your Top 10 for the decade? Finally, the Blog Cabins End of Year Spectacular for the best and worst of 2009 should hit the streets towards the end of January.

And then...

The Really Drawn-out Blog Cabins Decennial Spectacular: #2

Decennial, in case you're not hip to the term, means: 1. relating to or lasting for ten years, or 2. occurring every ten years. It's really a word that we should hear more often. Anyway, this will be my series where I count down my favorites from the last decade, and since I don't plan on it taking 10 years to finish, we're going to go with the second definition.

Previous day's posts:
12/21: Intro/#10: Idiocracy
12/22: #9: Children of Men
12/23: #8: Pan's Labyrinth
12/24: #7: Wall*E
12/26: #6: Memento
12/27: #5: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
12/28: #4: The Royal Tenenbaums
12/29: #3: Amelie

Number 2 on the RD-oBCDS is...

There Will Be Blood (2007)
Of all of the films on the Decennial, I've seen this one the least - just once, in the theater, upon its opening about two years ago. Fact is, it's been sitting on my DVR for six months now, awaiting a second viewing.

I don't know what's taking so long - why I haven't sat down for another helping of P.T. Anderson's phenomenal sweeping epic clash between capitalism and religion. It might have something to do with the nearly three hour run time, but that doesn't seem all that feasible given all of the films I've watched over that time. No, I think that there's a part of me that's afraid to experience it for a second time, afraid that I won't be as enamored of Daniel Day-Lewis' owning of the screen or Johnny Greenwood's haunting score or Paul Dano's coming-out party or any number of other aspects of the film that a single viewing might have blinded me to.

I'm sure my fears are unfounded. I'll watch it again and, like with most movies, notice more to love about it rather than vice versa. I'll convince myself even more so that Paul Thomas Anderson is perhaps the greatest filmmaker currently working or that DDL is our greatest living actor and other semi-obvious, shallow statements. And then, to celebrate my triumphant viewing of the film, I'll enjoy a nice, tall, frosty, chocolate --


Think you know what #1 will be? Stay tuned...the big unveiling is tomorrow!

And then...

The Really Drawn-out Blog Cabins Decennial Spectacular: #3

Decennial, in case you're not hip to the term, means: 1. relating to or lasting for ten years, or 2. occurring every ten years. It's really a word that we should hear more often. Anyway, this will be my series where I count down my favorites from the last decade, and since I don't plan on it taking 10 years to finish, we're going to go with the second definition.

Previous day's posts:
12/21: Intro/#10: Idiocracy
12/22: #9: Children of Men
12/23: #8: Pan's Labyrinth
12/24: #7: Wall*E
12/26: #6: Memento
12/27: #5: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
12/28: #4: The Royal Tenenbaums

Number 3 on the RD-oBCDS is...

Amélie (2001)
I don't know if it's more apropos to say that director Jean-Pierre Jeunet did a number on me...or that star Audrey Tautou did. Either way, I was smitten on first sight with Amélie, which has ten times the heart, humor and style of just about every Hollywood-produced "romantic comedy" put out (the closest they've come recently was with (500) Days of Summer).

The word "whimsy" is thrown around a lot in cinematic criticism, and it's usually used in a derogatory fashion, as if the mere act of being whimsical demeans the art at hand. I can think of no better argument against that line of thinking than this tale of a melancholy young Parisian who feels not quite lonely, but sans her soulmate, who she just knows is out there.

But Jeunet understood that the journey is much more important than the destination, so he put together an excellent story that unfolds like a treasure map for the viewer, with twists and turns and broken hearts...until finally, the heart is put back together again, and with every viewing, my heart grows even fonder for Amélie...and Amélie.

And then...