The State of the Cabins (1/19/11)

Things to Click On
* If you are a LAMB member and have not yet taken the LIONS for LAMBs poll for 2010, DO IT NOW! The link can be found here. (the Large Association of Movie Blogs)

* Hatter and I bicker about the plots of The Social Network and Citizen Kane, even though even if we hadn't seen them, the internet is full of plot summaries. (The Dark of the Matinee)

* Steve counts down his list of the top 10 directors that set the tone for the last decade. Feel free to disagree with some of his choices *coughSamRaimicough*. (The Film Cynics)

* First, Rachel noticed an odd trend in Jennifer Connelly movies; then she did a double-bill I've been meaning to do for years now...I own both DVDs, just never find a reason to. (Rachel's Reel Reviews)

* Kai's gonna become just the second movie blogging buddy that I'll meet in person; but first, he's gonna list his favorite Gary Busey flicks. (The List)

Quick sidenote: speaking of Busey, this Family Guy gag from their Christmas episode had me laughing more than anything from them in two years.




Movies watched for the first time (non-theatrically) since last week:
* Knowing
If I tell you I was disappointed with a Nic Cage flick, you're likely to roll your eyes and call me Captain Obvious or something. But just wait...


Knowing is actually a pretty good movie. Sure, director Alex Proyas (The Crow, Dark City) does his usual "third act gets friggin' loopy" business, but I was okay with that. If you think of the movie as an adult version of The Last Mimzy (I know, you didn't see that one, either), the nuttiness doesn't come across as so nutty. But see, that's just the problem. I had heard a little something about Nic Cage taking whacks at a tree with a baseball bat. Something or someone had me under the impression that he was doing battle against tree people. I knew there was something apocalyptic going down.

And yet, Knowing isn't all that crazy. It's a gloomy sci-fi thriller with some weird elements, but it never feels as though it's going off the rails. Proyas keeps a pretty steady hand and doles out the bizarro stuff just enough - this isn't The Happening, after all. And our buddy Nic - well, he never really does his Cage thing.

So, as you can imagine, I was pretty let down. Here I was looking for more mockery material and I ended up with a worthy viewing. Knowing won't knock your socks off, but it ain't a waste of your time, either.

Fletch's Film Rating:

	Expectation: "Whatever."
	Reality: "You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you."

LAMBScore:

* Oldboy
I went into this new classic pretty damn cold, and I'm glad I did. All I really knew was "hammer fight" and the chief image used of Oh Dae-Su cocked and loaded with said hammer.

Admittedly, I'm not much a fan of Asian cinema, so perhaps Oldboy isn't as fresh feeling to others as it was to me, but I got a real sense that, despite having a plot that could be narrowed down to "revenge story," it really felt like I was watching something new and completely original, a la Fight Club or Eternal Sunshine. Like the rules of predictable cinema had flown out the window and all I could do was sit back and enjoy the ride. This is the reason I defend the work of Richard Kelly (and Southland Tales in general) so much - I looooove that feeling of 'anything goes' (so long as it's still somewhat comprehensible; hence my disclaimers about Southland and distaste for the work of someone like David Lynch).

And boy does it ever in Oldboy. This movie's a great mindf*#k of a film.


Choi Min-sik puts on a hell of show - barely recognizable from the opening shots to the next scene to the rest of the film. Thankfully, I wasn't watching this in a theater - I could back up and catch lines of shots multiple times when needed, and it certainly was for a while there. It's funny at all the right and wrong times. And Lee Woo-jin and Mr. Han make for a terrific pair of villains - one stoic and mysterious, the other suave and vulnerable.

Oh, and to the fellas I talked to the other day, where I said I was a tad unimpressed with the hammer fight...my apologies: I did not realize it was a one-taker! Read that there was just a tad of CGI thrown in to perfect it, but for the most part, au naturel! Makes me want to watch it again.

I'll get to the rest of the Vengeance trilogy soon enough. Oh, and Choi Min-sik's hair is awesome. That is all.

Fletch's Film Rating:

	Expectation: "You're the best...around!"
	Reality: "It's in the hole!"

LAMBScore:

Music I'm currently obsessed with:
* Is it possible to be obsessed with a song or album that you've not yet even heard?

I woke up one morning this week with the words "halycon days" on the tip of my tongue. Didn't know why. Guess I just like the word "halycon," even though I have no idea what it is (I do that sometimes). Finally, another Best of 2010 reading brings it all back to me - Halycon Digest is the name of the latest Deerhunter album, and it's at or near the top of just about every indie music fan's list for 2010. I'm still not sure if I've ever even heard any Deerhunter songs, but I'd say that, given the universal love, there's probably an 80% I will dig it. I know I could just go to YouTube and listen to something from the album, but something's telling me to just buy it cold (an extreme rarity for music). Why not? Go crazy...

Book I'm currently reading:
* I'm still not finished with Stone Cold, but after having been away from it for a few weeks, I am back to it. Nearing the climax, and it's getting good - quite possibly my favorite of the three Camel Club books thus far.

Now, for the important question of what to read next. Commenter and goody buddy Buffett35 has lent me his copy of The Green Mile after seeing the film on my Films to Watch in 2011 list, telling me I pretty much "gotta" read the books first. Okie doke. Believe it or not, it'll be the first Stephen King book I've ever read...

And then...

Fletch's Mini Film Review: Knowing

I caved. The pressure got to me again. I sacrificed half of my principles and $20 or so of my dollars (between Mrs. Fletch and I). I had to see if the unintentional comedy could remotely come close to matching The Wicker Man. That's right - I saw Knowing.

And you know what? I friggin' liked it. Alex Proyas' apocalyptic time capsule thriller somehow managed to sink its claws into me early on, its linear jumping framed confidently by the director. Showing that same steady hand, he even manages to coax a subtle (at times), dare I say powerful performance out of his star, the traditionally awful Nic Cage.

Lost in a sea of chaos searching for answers, Cage offers up the numerically mad manic energy that Jim Carrey failed to grasp in the similarly themed The Number 23, though the end-of-the-world gravitas that Knowing brings might have been the bigger key at play.

Sure, there's some unintentional comedy to be had, including, but not limited to, Cage whacking a tree with a baseball bat whilst screaming about 'whisper people,' but it never gets out of hand and, thankfully, a hair is never wildly out of place. While it may not be the four-star gem that Roger Ebert declared it to be, Knowing is certainly worth a look, and forced me to eat just a little bit of crow.

Fletch's Film Rating:

"Would I lie to you?"


Random note: Happy April Fool's Day. In case you missed my similar 'review' of Next, click here.

And then...

$24.8 million?

The top films at the box office each weekend for 2009:

Jan 2-4: Marley and Me, $24.2 million
Jan 9-11: Gran Torino, $29.5 million
Jan 16-18: Paul Blart: Mall Cop, $31.8 million
Jan 23-25: Paul Blart: Mall Cop, $21.6 million
Jan 30 - Feb 1: Taken, $24.7 million
Feb 6-8: He's Just Not That Into You, $27.8 million
Feb 13-15: Friday the 13th, $40.6 million
Feb 20-22: Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail, $41 million
Feb 27 - Mar 1: Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail, $16.2 million
Mar 6-8: Watchmen, $55.2 million
Mar 13-15: Race to Witch Mountain, $24.4 million
Mar 20-22: Knowing, $24.8 million

Here are the Rotten Tomatoes scores for each of those movies:

Marley and Me: 60%
Gran Torino: 80%
Paul Blart: Mall Cop: 32%
Taken: 57%
He's Just Not That Into You: 43%
Friday the 13th: 26%
Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail: 26%
Watchmen: 64%
Race to Witch Mountain: 39%
Knowing: 25%

"No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public." - H.L. Mencken

Are you proud, America?

And then...

TGITDNMAR (3/20/09)

It's that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It's The Day New Movies Are Released.

Did you know that today is the first day of spring? Hollywood did, and it's gracing us with two movies that actually look watchable (!), along with one potential mega-stinker that must be watched to appreciate it's Cageness. Oops, did I give away which one it was? My bad.

Knowing
Good friend and better writer Daniel Getahun (of Getafilm) has already had the, um, good fortune of seeing Knowing. He gave us a quick review in a comment yesterday:

"I have to step in here for the good of humanity and say Knowing is horrendously awful and the worst movie I've seen in the last 8 months. As a brother-in-arms with Fletch against Cage, I can tell him this is our worst nightmare come true or it's a must-see for a reload of anti-Cage ammunition. It's like a bad M. Night Shyamalan movie, but Shyamalan doesn't play the hero and the special effects are better. More details in my "review" if you don't mind spoilers."

I'm glad Daniel put in that note about reloading for anti-Cage ammunition. As you may recall, Mrs. Fletch and I actually went to see National Treasure 2 in the theaters, as when it came out we had seen just about everything we wanted to, but we still wanted to go out to a movie. So we tried to pick something terrible and just have fun with it. Turned out I didn't hate it as much as I could have, but I see the potential for seeing Knowing on a similar plane. Probably won't, as there are a number of other releases out now that I'm interested in seeing, but this one will definitely be seen on TV at some point in the future. I can only hope it lives up to the promise of The Wicker Man.

Also: this doesn't belong anywhere else, but the kid that plays Cage's son is a 10-year old from Texas named Chandler Canterbury. Seriously? That's got to be the most effete, Little Lord Fauntleroy-ish name I've ever heard of. Oh wait - his younger brother is named Shelby and his older brother is Colby. From Texas? How can these children not be getting beaten by their classmates on a daily basis (not that I'm promoting such an act)?
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 8%

Duplicity
Doesn't this movie just smell bad? I mean, walk-in-the-house-and-hit-by-the-smell-of-cat-poop reaks? Like all the worst elements from the Ocean's films and Mr. and Mrs. Smith were combined into one stinker?

But then you see that Tony Gilroy, the writer-director of Michael Clayton (which, by the way, somehow doesn't lose a thing with multiple viewings) is the auteur here as well. And it's not like Clive Owen or Julia Roberts are generally associated with crappy movies (The International, The Mexican and Shoot 'Em Up, notwithstanding).

Long story short - I'm on board. I mean, I'm a sucker for a heist/con movie anyway, and I don't know how much it has to do with the shite that's been released over the first three months of the year, but this comes in second place this week. Though, I must say - even though he's no Travolta or Cage, doesn't it seem like we're bordering on Clive Owen overload? Two films released in '04, two in '05, three in '06, two in '07, none in '08, but two already in the first few months of '09. I need a break, either way. Oh, and shame on all involved - Inside Man 2 has been announced. You've got to be effing kidding me.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 70%

I Love You, Man
You know, strange as this may sound, I've seen practically no commercials for Man. From all accounts I've heard, this is the most heavily promoted film being released this week, but if I hadn't seen that one commercial for it, I'd barely know it was out.

And you know what? I haven't gone in search of the trailer, either, and I'm not going to. With the two leads, along with co-stars such as J.K. Simmons, Jon Favreau and bit players (I'm assuming) like Joe LoTruglio, Thomas Lennon and Matt Walsh (yes, they may be future FF-UNs, though they aren't unfamiliar to me), I'm on board already and I want to go in as cold as possible.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 95%

And then...

Catching up with...Nic Cage

What would Superman be without Lex Luthor? Batman without The Joker? Seinfeld without Newman? It's been some 4+ months since CAGEFEST, and you'll have to forgive me if I've been feeling a bit like I'd encountered some kryptonite lately. What can I say? The man is my nemesis and, sad as it sounds, Blog Cabins suffers when my distaste for him is not brought to the forefront for months at a time. When I'm not bagging on the guy, I can feel my powers draining from my body and I hate to say it, but 2008 was a bad year in this respect, what with just a single Cage "film" hitting theaters (none other than one Bangkok Dangerous, of course).

Lucky for us (?), 2008 was dry for Nic only because he'd been working so hard on 2009 and beyond. The man amongst men is up to eleven projects in one level of development or another. If only IMDb would let curious fellows like myself go into hardcore statistician mode to see if that was a record - as you know, Nic is nothing if not a giant whore, pimping himself out wherever there is a dollar to be made.

"But what are these eleven projects?," you might be asking yourself. Well, lucky for you, I am here. Below I have previewed them, in chronological order and in all their glory, and even provided a Projected Level of Cageness (a synonym for sucktitude, as you must know), from 1-5 Cages. Enjoy!

Post-production
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans
Director Werner Herzog wants you to know that this is not a remake: "No, it's not, although I cannot fully verify it because I have never seen Bad Lieutenant made by Abel Ferrara. I do not know who the man is, although he has made a lot of noise about this." Classy, Werner. He also has this to say about our main man Cage: "I took him where he has not been before." Where? Talentville? Cool City? Hairland?

On the other other hand, Bad co-stars Val Kilmer, Eva Mendes, Fairuza Balk and Shawn Hatosy. Interesting...
Projected Level of Cageness:




Knowing
Alex Proyas (The Crow, Dark City) directs this mystery/thriller that stars our man Cage as a teacher that, through a sequence of events, comes to believe that he and his family may hold the key to the future of the world. Or something like that. Typical ego-centric character choosing by Nic, but the plot actually does sound kind of interesting, and though Proyas hasn't been all that hot as of late (I, Robot), he's know for being somewhat of a visionary.
Projected Level of Cageness:




G-Force
Hard for even Nic to screw this one up too much. It's an animated flick (brought to you by Disney and Jerry Bruckheimer) about specially trained guinea pigs that help save the world. Other vocal talent: Bill Nighy, Sam Rockwell, Steve Buscemi, Will Arnett, and Penelope Cruz.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Filming
Kick-Ass
Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake, Stardust) directs this comic book adaptation about a high school boy who takes his love of superheroes way too far, attempting to train and become one himself. Sounds like Spider-Man without the, you know, skills. Anyway, Cage "will play a former cop who, in his quest to bring down an evil drug lord played by Mark Strong, has trained his 11-year-old daughter to be the ruthless vigilante Hit Girl," says Wikipedia.

This is a tough one. Vaughn has a good rep...but something about it reminds me too much of Wanted, and if you'll recall, I was no great fan of that. Though Christopher Mintz-Plasse (McLovin) has a role as well. Hmmm.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Astro Boy
More "teaming" with Bill Nighy in this animated tale of...wait a sec. Read the plot summary from IMDb and tell me if it reminds you of anything: "When a scientist's young son dies, he secretly creates a powerful robot child to replace him, however the robot uses it's incredible powers to become a world famous super-hero, and faces his biggest challenge when an alien race threatens Earth."

Hi, A.I. with a superhero twist thrown in! Could they have stolen more blatantly? That's it, I'm changing the name of this site to Rotten Roma Tomatoes.

Freddie Highmore voices Astro Boy.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Season of the Witch
Nicolas re-teams with Gone in Sixty Seconds helmer Dominic Sena (boy, Kalifornia sure is looking like a fluke) for this actioner about knights in the 14th century suspecting a witch of nasty things, not the least of which is being the source of...dunh-dunh-duh...the Black Plague. Cage is pictured at right in a pic from USA Today (click image to enlarge).
Projected Level of Cageness:




Pre-production
The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Yes, you guessed it - a live-action "adaptation" (haha) of the classic poem that inspired the classic sequence in Fantasia, starring Cage as the sorcerer and Jay Baruchel (Knocked Up, Tropic Thunder) as the apprentice. Brought to you by Disney (!), Jerry Bruckheimer (of course), and director Jon Turtletaub (the National Treasure flicks). Good christ - what an incenstuous bunch.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Riot
"As part of the crime-prevention program Scared Straight, a governor's delinquent son is sent to prison for what's to be a short period of time. While behind bars, however, the kid is taken hostage during a riot, forcing a lifer (Cage) to come to his aid." Directed by John Carpenter.

Is it just me, or does Cage have a serious hero complex? I'm surprised that his death at the end of Leaving Las Vegas didn't simultaneously cure cancer. Play a janitor already.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Amarillo Slim
Biopic of the famous poker player. Ok, sounds pretty good. To be directed by Milos Forman (Man on the Moon, The People vs. Larry Flynt). What?!? Does this mean Cage is going to grace us with real acting ability? I don't effing believe it.

The full story from the Hollywood Reporter.
Projected Level of Cageness:




Announced (very little info available)
Electric God
Hmmm..."God" in the title, no less. Very subtle. The story was broken in Variety. Seemed fine and dandy to me until the last line said "Saturn [Cage's production company] is in post [-production] on Andrew Niccol's Lord of War and is prepping The Wicker Man, written and to be directed by Neil LaBute." I'm thinking, "All those movies have come out already!"

The Electric God story came out in 2005. Don't hold your breath for this one...
Projected Level of Cageness:




The Dance
Biopic of boxer/boxing coach Billy "The Kid" Roth. Based on a documentary from 2003. Full story here (c'mon people, even I can spell Nicolas' first name right). Co-stars 50 Cent.
Projected Level of Cageness:




There you have it, folks. The next 2-3 years of Cage. Are you at the edge of your seat yet?

Cage on IMDb: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000115/

And then...