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Apr 5, 2011

Imagining sequels that will never happen (#9)

(For past installments of this feature, click here.)

The setup: It's a favorite pastime of mine to come up with sequel names for movies that will either never be made due to performance, critical response, or just because of their subject matter. Apply a healthy dose of massively awesome MS Paint Skillz™ and voila! Anyway, here's the latest batch. Can't believe it's been more than a year since the last one! I really gotta do these more often...

Some people never learn.




















Though I would go for Lose Lose there, didn't you?



















It's a cheap, unfunny joke, but you only get so many opportunities to put Tom Arnold into one of these posters. I had the shot, and I took it.















This will be rated NC-17.




















No comment.




















This is one of my new favorites. I love my shoddy MS Paint Skillz™, but I do like it even more when I can make a subtle change that looks totally real. It's a rarity!


15 people have chosen wisely: on "Imagining sequels that will never happen (#9)"

Andrew Simon said...

Hehehe. KING'S 'EVEN LONGER' SPEECH gets NC-17 rating. Hehehe. Alright, need to stop. Maturity. Got it. Right.

Yes, do more of 'em, mate! They never fail to make a smile.

Colin Biggs said...

The King's Filthy Speech?

I always wondered what the porno would be called. King's Reach Around?

ratatouille's archives said...

Bonjour Fletch!
The one with umm...as I clear my throat "actor" Tom Arnold, is too funny!

Now, when it comes to "The King Speech"...I would re-title that
film "The King Put You To Sleep"...Because that film was soooo boring that it put me to...sleep!

I didn't understand one word the cast was saying. Actress Helena Bonham-Carter, (I like her as an actress)even looked bored and she was in the film.

Merci,
DeeDee ;-D

ratatouille's archives said...

oh là là I forgot to add an apostrophe following the word The King's Speech. I'am so sorry!

Jack L said...

I really like the Legion/Priest one, two films I have no desire whatsoever to see...

The Buried one was cool as well, you should do more of these!

Thaddeus said...

I'm very impressed that you did all this without ever resorting to my favorite sub-title "... 2: Electric Boogaloo"

Fletch said...

@ Andy - the funny thing is, I wasn't even making the penis joke with tat NC-17 comment - just referencing the PG-13 debacle that's going on with TKS right now.

And I've done a bunch! Click the label to see more from over the years.

@ Fitz - Good question. I'm gonna go with The King's Peach.

@ DeeDee - Not one for English accents, eh? I guess you don't like Trainspotting then...

@ Jack - Thanks! Yeah, Priest and Legion..a year apart, and seemingly so similar.

And see above - I've done lots more!

@ Thaddeus - Yes, I think I've managed to avoid the Boogaloo over the years. Though coming up with creative sequel names can be tough sometimes...

Stevee Taylor said...

Hahahahahaha x200. You are a humourous being. I had a good chuckle over that King's Speech one.

Rachel said...

So is Aron going to lose a leg in the sequel? Makes the poster a bit of a spoiler;)

Brilliance, as always.

Fletch said...

@ Stevee - :) :) x 200. Thanks!

@ Rachel - Yes! And thank you for noticing that. It's not as though him losing an arm was a spoiler for the first one, so I don't think it's any worse here.

Sebastian Gutierrez said...

Some people never learn. Ha! Excellent!

Mayday said...

You took it.... AND BROKE A MAJOR RULE OF ENGAGEMENT!!!!

Fletch said...

@ Sebastian - Haha, thanks. The third movie in that series is gonna be quite painful to watch. Some one-armed, one-legged guy having to cut off another limb. Just gut-wrenching and emotional!!

@ Mayday - Bless you for getting that.

Simon said...

I will personally fund Buried Deeper. The public has to know.

Fletch said...

@ Simon - Thanks. It will cost approximately 75 more dollars to make the sequel. Just might need a few more shovels and some additional labor to dig a bit deeper; other than that, we're golden.