TGITDNMAR (8/13/10)

It's that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It's The Day New Movies Are Released.

After feeling bad about it all day, I was verbally smacked down by commenter/part-time contributor Kid Vegas in the comments section of the previous post. It's 12:34 on Saturday morning, but damnit, THE PEOPLE demand their TGITDNMAR, and who the hell am I to withhold it from them?

Eat Pray Love
Have I just done my duty as a heterosexual male, or have the marketers suceeded more at hitting their target demo and avoiding that which will not likely care about their product? I ask this because, here we have a big-budget, studio star vehicle featuring the biggest female movie star of the last 20 years, directed by the hot (I guess?) creator of Nip/Tuck and Glee...and I haven't seen a single thing for this flick outside of the poster you see to your right. Not one trailer, not one commercial. Granted, I've taken myself more or less out of the race when it comes to TV, as about the only thing I watch on broadcast TV anymore is reruns of Family Guy on Cartoon Network (surely a premier destination for chick-flick advertising), but nothing at the movies? Mrs. Fletch and I see, on average, 1.5 movies per week, anything from The Other Guys to The Girl Who Played with Fire to Salt to Winter's Bone. You'd think the trailer might've cropped up at least once or twice over the last three months.

Not that I'm complaining; I'm assuming I'd have little interest in this anyhow. Roberts' star vehicles have never been my cup of tea, and I could give a shit about either of Murphy's TV shows. At least it's got Javier Bardem, James Franco, and Billy Crudup in it...
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 3%

The Expendables
I've said it before and I'll say it again - I can't help but feel that this flick's ultimate failure was in not securing Jean Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal to co-star. Even if they only showed up for a minute - which is about all I'm expecting out of Ahnuld's role - it would have felt a lot better than what they ended up going for: Randy Couture and Gary Daniels filling out the cast. Who are they you might ask? A whatever wrestler and the hell if I know, respectively.

I'd like to see this, but I'm sure the emotion that will be filling me most whilst watching won't be intensity (that's an emotion, right?) but pity. Pity that Stallone could never shape his career like his co-star Bruce Willis did, stuck playing the action star (and the action star alone) at 64 rather than being able to break out of the mold (for what it's worth, he tried, and succeeded somewhat in Cop Land, if not so much in Oscar or others). He surely doesn't need my pity, but he's getting it anyway, and a trip down memory lane can't be that bad, can it?
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 64%

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
From the start, I really wished that I anticipated Scott like so many other bloggers I know. I guess it's a sign of old age? I don't know - I've played video games for most of my life, but I'd never call myself a gamer, mostly since I only really ever had interest in sports games. And I might've read G.I. Joe comics as a kid, but that's where it ended (I went the baseball card route instead). So maybe it's just that the combination of influences and reference materials on hand in Scott were never all the way up my alley anyway.

Early reviews are in, though, and they're super-strong. Here's hoping - for the Mad Hatter's sake if nothing else - that I'll be pleasantly in love with the whole thing. Stranger things have happened.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 100%