TGITDNMAR (11/13/09)

It's that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It's The Day New Movies Are Released.

2012
For those masochists that are actually eagerly anticipating this movie, might I at least share this nugget: Roland Emmerich's latest D.O.A. P.O.S. is 158 minutes. That's two hours and thirty eight minutes!

I suppose that's how long it takes to have a movie that shows the destruction of the entire freaking world, piece by piece and landmark by landmark. To be honest, part of my is dying to see this, if only to experience just how terrible it is, but I just can't support it financially and look at myself in the mirror.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 7%

The Boat That Rocked Pirate Radio
You know how to judge when a massive new edit and re-titling of a movie are a failed idea? When those alterations become the story rather than the movie itself.
Solid cast, decent story, all-around light, fun feeling...and I don't know a single person that cares about this movie. As for me, I'm bothered on principle by the changes made - the edits made might in fact make the flick better (though not from what I've heard) and the title might indeed make it more marketable in North America (we have Talk Like a Pirate Day, after all), but it's not like this was some festival film that had yet to be released to a wide audience. It was released in the UK some seven months ago, and opened throughout the world shortly thereafter. North America is essentially the last place to get it. You don't change the name of a film that's been seen the world over for the last 6+ months - sorry.

Dumber still, the changes made will have ZERO impact on the film's success here. It's totally impossible to prove, but I guarantee it. This is a film that had limited appeal (like The Damned United) no matter what it's title - why bother?

And since I'm here, a reminder that Raiders of the Lost Ark will never be titled Indiana Jones and the... in my head, and Star Wars will never be titled Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope. Ok?

End rant.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing: 20%

The Messenger
Can you say Acting Showcase for the Academy?

I'll be shocked if there's not at least one nomination from the three leads (Woody, Ben Foster, and Samantha Morton) out of this flick, and just as I pre-judged 2012, I'll pre-judge this and say that I'm guessing that it's worthy of two or three.

Though it's a difficult subject matter, Harrelson and Morton = two of my favorite actors, and people that I'll see in anything. This also looks to be a great double bill along with the equally depressing Brothers, starring Tobey Maguire, Jake Jill N. Hall and Natalie Portman.

Related note: I think I might earn my Masters in Iraqi Film degree pretty soon. Rendition and The Kingdom are amongst the few that I've missed, and word is that I haven't missed much with either of them...
Fletch's Chance of Viewing: 96%