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Sep 5, 2008

TGITDNMAR (9/5/08)

It's that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It's The Day New Movies Are Released.

Bangkok Dangerous (now going by it's new title: BangDang)
You know how last time I said that that week was the worst week yet for new releases? Well, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that I was wrong. Way wrong. Horribly, mutilatedly wrong. Now for the good news:
With just ONE wide release today, and with that ONE release being the worst looking Nic Cage flick since Ghost Rider, it's safe to say that this is, was, and forever shall be "The Worst Weekend at the Movies...Ever." Thus, I'm not allowed to say that anymore, and you won't have to hear it. If I ever slip up and you should hear me utter something even close to those words, please scold me immediately. The only exception would be another weekend with these circumstances (one opening, it being a Nic Cage vehicle), and even then the movie would somehow have to look worse than BangDang. Not likely.
Fletch's Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 0%, or equal to the percentage of real hairs on Nic's head.

Don't forget The Great Movie Poster Piece Contest is going on now! Click on the image above for more details. WIN PRIZES! Impress the neighborhood children and random strangers at the supermarket! Mock your dog's inability to get more than 3 correct!


7 people have chosen wisely: on "TGITDNMAR (9/5/08)"

The Movie Whore said...

Really outside Leaving Las Vegas how many good Cage flicks are there?

Maybe Valley Girl and then I am out.

Nic Cage said...

The Rock should have won every Oscar known to man!!!

Graham said...

MovieWhore, my friend and I just had this conversation. I don't know Valley Girl, but we came up with:
Moonstruck
Raising Arizona
Leaving Las Vegas
Red Rock West
Adaptation.

You can make cases for some others (The Rock, Guarding Tess) but really I think those 5 are it. Three decades of making movies...5 good movies.

Fletch, I know this one looks bad, but there's no way it's worse than the combined terribleness of College, Disaster Movie, and Babylon AD. If Traitor had come out that Friday you would have a case, but it came out midweek. I bet those three movies will barely combine to have a higher metacritic score than BangDang.

Farmacy said...

I'm not sure where to put this, so i'm dumping it here...

I watched "There will be Blood" last night, and found it to be pretty bad. The acting was good, the script was fine, but I just didn't care.

#1. I didn't give a shit about Plainview. I didn't love him, I didn't hate him. I was completely indifferent to him. No time was spent making me care about him.
#2. I liked the son, but then all development with him went away when he went deaf. Once he was deaf, he was just a prop until the very end.
#3. The music was distracting. It didn't enhance the scenes, it altered them.
#4. There really wasn't a plot... at least not as far as I could see. It was almost like a family guy episode where random crap happened, and while it kindof built on itself, it didn't REALLY matter.

Maybe I'm just a bad movie goer, but I found "There will be blood" to be a pointless waste of 180 minutes. Can you explain to me why I'm wrong? or what true movie lovers loved about it? (And that's not being sarcastic)

Nick said...

farmacy: I agree with you on points 3 and 4 quite a bit (especially number 3).

I think what a lot of people loved about the movie was mainly the acting and possibly the dynamic between Daniel Day-Lewis and Paul Dano. That's what I loved about it, anyway. I mentioned in my review way back when that I found myself not really caring about the movie whenever Paul Dano wasn't in it. But when he was, those were my favorite scenes.

Fox said...

Fletch, did you see that Bangkok Dangerous was the lowest grossing #1 movie in the last fiver years??? Don't celebrate too hard.

Fletch said...

Of course I saw that, Fox! I'm putting up something a little later to celebrate. :)