TGITDNMAR (11/16/07)

It's that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It's The Day New Movies Are Released.

A full slate of flicks on tap for this weekend, with two super-wide releases, one kinda wide (I'm guessing), and two limited release. In order:

Beowulf
They need to just stop running ads for this film, because the more I see of it, the worse I think it looks. Had I just seen a single trailer three months ago, followed by them releasing it now, there would be about a 90% chance of my seeing it, but lately, it just looks like a (bad) video game. Still intrigued, but just barely.
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing (in the theater): 50%

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium
Remember The Emporium department store? No? Maybe it was just a California store. Hell, I don't even know that it doesn't still exist. Anyway, what an awful title. That said, since it seems Mrs. Fletch and I have seen depressing movie after depressing movie over the past two months (In the Valley of Elah, Michael Clayton, Gone Baby Gone, et al), this film could be the antidote we're looking for. I'm almost ready to see Fred Claus, for chrissakes. Ok, maybe I'm not that desperate for a happy film, but still. The presence of Natalie Portman and Dustin Hoffman, whom I've loved lately, doesn't hurt either, and it's written and directed by Stranger Than Fiction writer Zach Helm - all good things.
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing: 43%

Love in the Time of Cholera
Hmmm...maybe Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium isn't all that bad of a title in retrospect. The featured review on IMDb says it all about this one for me:

"The story is a bit ridiculous. A young man loves a girl to whom he proposes, but she marries a rich doctor whom she doesn't love at the insistence of her greedy father. The young man then copes with this by having sex with hundreds of women, all the while waiting for his true love's husband to die.

The first thing I was thinking was, "Dude, get over it. I've been rejected by a girl, and honestly, there are lots of fish in the sea." But this guy just can't let go."

And here I thought this was just a retread of last year's The Painted Veil (itself a remake), which I believe takes place around the same time period, what with Cholera playing a major role in that film, too. Either way - meh.
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing: 8%

Margot at the Wedding
The latest from writer-director Noah Baumbach (The Squid and the Whale, Kicking and Screaming), Margot is sure to be good-great, and I'd be all up for seeing it, except...I don't really care for either of the stars (Nicole Kidman and Jennifer Jason Leigh). Sure, they're each great actresses, as they've shown over the years, but something about either of them mixed with the angsty black comedy that Baumbach produces just doesn't sound like a good combination. Was Squid vet Laura Linney unavailable? I guess she was busy making The Savages, another soon-to-be released indie (co-starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman) that looks better.
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing: 36%

Southland Tales
Richard Kelly has exactly one feature film under his belt, yet people are dying to see this? I guess when that one film is Donnie Darko, the reaction is somewhat justified, but it still seems early to me. Let's let Kelly get at least a few great films in the can before we crown him the next David Fincher, okay?

The real news here is the re-teaming of The Rundown co-stars Dwayne Johnson and Seann William Scott. If you haven't seen that, give it a chance, as it's probably one of the better action movies of the decade, relying on the charisma of its stars rather than a ton of firepower and slow-mo sunset/chopper shots.

If that wasn't enough good news, there's this: Curtis Armstrong co-stars as well. 'Nuff said. That just boosted the percentage below by at least 19%.
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing: 66%